Friday, 13 June 2008

So, I work in retail...

...I don't hate retail, but sometimes...

Customers can get on your tits. Why is it that some of them believe that they can threaten and control you? Do they really think that threatening to sue me because they must have their TV assessed for faults before I can do anything? Do they really think that their consumer rights allow them to get an exchange or refund because they don't like something they've used for six weeks, and if they shout the words 'Trading standards' in the shop it will magically change both the law and my mind? Do they think that I can't spot that they have broken their camera/hoover/TV/iPod, and that if I do spot it that I should send it off because Olympus/Philips/Sony/Apple could never realise that: their cameras don't have cracked screens with a thumbprint at the centre of the crack/their hoovers don't have a catch that snaps of when you look at it/their TV's don't suddenly develop a hole through the screen after 7 months/their MP3 players don't naturally come bent into a curve with their screens permenantly black?

The customers who labour under these miss-apprehensions are blessed with a holier than though attitude. This, I'm afraid is an invariable fact. They believe that they are right and preach their version of the truth like a southern pastor ministering to his flock. They also automatically come in already angry and ready for a fight, for some reason this makes me slightly less than willing to sort out their problem, oh I'll do exactly what I must, but not a step further, nope, you come in and shout at me and it will get you precisely nowhere. Often the problem is that what I must do is tell them that they are going to get nothing, nada, zilch. Now what do you think that does for someone already built up to fight their "righteous" (in their own mind) fight. That's right, it makes them rather angry, and angry deluded self righteousness makes me hate people. Hate them good and proper.

So some advice, if you have busted your device, don't bother bringing it back unless you have insurance or want to pay, we will find out that it's your fault, and we will do fuck all for you. If your device goes wrong, no matter what you do/shout/claim/say I can't change what I can do for you, if I must send it for repair, I will, if I can exchange it, I will, shouting will not change this, and really, don't you think that it would be easier for me to exchange everything anyone ever said was faulty? It would, really, but do you think we'd make a profit if we did? And no,  before you make any claims, you wouldn't get it exchanged if you went to our competitors, they aren't dumb either, they can see you broke it just like I can. 

If it weren't for customers retail would be easier/more boring/not exist/not provide me with anyone to hate. I'd miss it...a good hate does you good!

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